Waxing

Kristen has a question about getting waxed.

I'm thinking about waxing, but I'm not sure if the pain is worth the results. I've tried plucking, but that's just too painful; shaving is easy, however the hair grows in way too fast! Ugh, I'm torn, please give me your expert opinion.

Answer: At first I was thinking you were maybe talking about sportin a mega unibrow (like Santino Marella...google him) or a sa-weet chick-stache like my 7th grade teacher enjoyed rocking (along with yellow teeth, leiterhosen, and stories about naked cowboys in hot tubs), but then you dropped the whole shaving deal, and I figured that wasn't it. And since plucking your legs would take forever and you'd just be a straight up douchetard to try and pluck your pits, I'm gonna assume you're talking about your fishbox.

So here's the deal -- it doesn't take a f*cking rocket scientist to figure out that trying to pluck the f*cking pubes out of your cooter region is one of the dumbest ideas you've ever had. Seriously? Plucking? It's a sensitive ass area to begin with, and you're gonna take a pair of tweezers and try to puck each and every hair out? Which clearly means you have a bush...so you and your vag just suck at life all together to start.

So I get why you're thinking about waxing, since shaving doesn't last long at all and you don't wanna have the Rapunzel of vaginas, but look...whether you idiotically pluck your vag hairs or wax them, bottom line is...it's gonna suck. Hard. Like...think of being fresh outta the shower and having your ass wailed on with a cane made of bamboo. That sh*t is gonna hurt. I say if you're THAT pissed off about having to shave every few days/once a week, you pony up the money to get laser hair removal on the area and be done with it. If not, then just suck up the shaving. Sure it's a pain in the ass, but at least you're not killing the dudes you're hooking up with by way of pubeball.